--, Gentlemen, for your information, I have a question to ask you. To me, this was an oxymoron, doing a painting of a dancer. Most bacteria have the decency to be microscopic. Jul 29, 2014 - My friend said an oxymoron board would be hard to do.....Challenge accepted. category for your enjoyment. The audience was a failure. --. 'Just lost a shoe?' --.

I'm not crazy, I'm just creatively insane. The deaf Policeman heard the noise and came to arrest the two dead boys. Always remember that you are unique just like everybody else. --, News Coverage!! Then it's just hilarious. This is the mother list of Oxymoron's that will leave you saying, 'Yup, that's one hell of a Oxymoron list'.

When I grow up, I wanna be a kid, I wanna have some fun and stay forever young. --. I take it that a successful therapy is an oxymoron.

--. We had an unlimited budget and we have exceeded it. The Internet must govern itself.

But there is also always some reason in madness. --, I have a terrible memory. He answered, 'Nope, just found one'. --. There is only one difference between a madman and me. Samuel Goldwyn: What kind of dancing does Martha Graham do? I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong. Like 'Setbacks,' I knew that was gone be the first one; I knew 'Habits & Contradictions.' It was the best of times. “i find nothing more depressing than optimism.”. --, ‎We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it.

If you're always right, then there is something wrong. Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day. Failure is part of the process of success. Are you illiterate? When told his son was getting married: Thank heaven. He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. --, Our comedies are not to be laughed at. I see better when my eyes are closed, but heart is open. Goldwyn: Certainly. A dream you dream together is reality.

Answer: Rainbow! Anyone who isn't confused here doesn't really know what's going on. --, I never said most of the things I said. --, We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open. --.

Wise Old Sayings is a database of thousands of inspirational, humorous, and thoughtful quotes, sorted by --. You know, my degrees are in computer engineering. Sometimes, silence is the most important thing we can hear.

"Fair is foul, and foul is fair", "Parting is such sweet sorrow", "O brawling love! --, Happiness is something that multiplies when it is divided. I never know retirement mean such hard work. These phrases have meaning, even though the words contradict each other. Samuel Goldwyn: I don't want her then, modern dancing is so old fashioned.

--, I think we risk becoming the best informed society that has ever died of ignorance. Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.

The soldiers manning the missile launcher will be unarmed.

--, I must follow the people. --. My parents divorced when I was born, and my mother is a political science professor, like a feminist Mormon, which is sort of an oxymoron. If it's a classified ad, why is it publicly published? When I grow up, I wanna be a kid, Look at all the really cool things a kid can get into, ooh! Free advice is worth what you paid for it. --, Nobody goes to Miami in the Winter. You talk in circles when I need a straight line.

Groucho Marx Funny Oxymoron Examples Over-the-top Oxymoron Example Cruel Examples of Oxymorons Examples of Oxymoron Phrases Funny Joke Requests – Examples of Oxymorons at Work Funny and Strange Words Annoying, irritating and sometimes downright silly expressions Sponsored Links ∇ Funny Oxymoron Examples English contains a rich … --, Every director bites the hand that lays the golden egg. --, If you haven't made any mistakes recently, you must be doing something wrong. They are often two-word phrases. I am opinionated yet open-Minded. I believe that 'advocacy journalism' is not an oxymoron. We have two lives, and the second begins when we realize we only have one. Writers and poets have used it for centuries as a literary device to describe life's inherent conflicts and incongruities. This phrase qualifies as an oxymoron because the words "same" and "difference" have opposite meanings. Dancers are always moving. --, If you're gonna do something wrong, do it right.

--, I'm not the type to say 'I told you so'. --, I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat.

Ah, the good old times when we were so unhappy! --, Everyone writes on the walls except me. They say it's not as bad as they say it is. ‎What's the weather like? From the equality of rights springs identity of our highest interests; you cannot subvert your neighbor's rights without striking a dangerous blow at your own. 'We haven't got one; we had one, but he died three weeks ago'. The term 'serious actor' is kind of an oxymoron, isn't it? Oxymoron: When an astronaut feels under the weather.

A blind man looks back into the future with the ear-splitting whispers of unconcealed ghosts thundering silently. Perspective is in the eye of the beholder. --. Time is beyond our control, and the clock keeps ticking regardless of how we lead our lives. It's just learning not to take the first no. I've been saying in the press that being a NY Post investigator reporter is an oxymoron. The end is drawing near to give way to a new beginning, The only certainty is that nothing is certain. - Arthur Baer, I distinctly remember forgetting that. I want to be together, yet alone. I hate this feeling of not knowing what I'm feeling. A long time from now will be now really soon. It isn't an optical illusion. The following infographic looks at the trends and sad state of social media privacy.

It turned out that he was "alright!". There's not enough sarcasm in it. A woman met a man walking along the street wearing only one shoe. --, Only when all who surround you are different will you truly belong. --, Don't pay any attention to the critics; don't even ignore them.
Free advice is worth what you paid for it. The golden rule is that there are no golden rules. - George Bernard Shaw, Always be sincere, even when you don’t mean it. --, ‎The ability of writers to imagine what is not the self, to familiarize the strange and mystify the familiar, is the test of their power. - Winston Churchill, I never said most of the things I said. They are specifically adapted as obligate carnivores, This means the vegetarian cat is an oxymoron at best and a blatant lie at worst. Home » Communication » 48 Funny and Clever Oxymorons. Samuel Goldwyn, a very influential movie producer during the 1920's through the 1950's, was famous for his humor. People think they're going to get something that's a lot different from what they get. Did you hear that Johnny's left side was chopped off? --, I was always an independent, even when I had partners. --, I am so Clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. We have no choice. - Oscar Wilde, The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

Treat them all the same by treating them differently. When Darkness prevails and Silence governs the place; only then I can See and Hear everything! --, Bookkeeper: Mr. Goldwyn, our files are bulging with paperwork we no longer need. The concept of a Garden of Eden would be rather atrocious to them.”, “And there’s no figuring out the unknowable. Melancholy is the pleasure of being sad. - W.C. Fields, I always avoid prophesying beforehand because it is much better to prophesy after the event has already taken place.
The 50-50-90 rule: Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. Am I not their leader? --, So I say, "Live and let live." It's like the two things. I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them at least five years.

--, Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. I'm perfect in my imperfections, happy in my pain, strong in my weaknesses and beautiful in my own way, cause I'm Me. --, A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.

Anyone who can't go along with that, take him outside and shoot the m@#$%^&*! While users are concerned about privacy more than ever, they are also putting all of their information on the internet to become easily accessed. Correct thinkers think that 'baseball trivia' is an oxymoron: nothing about baseball is trivial. You know, it's an oxymoron in a sense. --, If Roosevelt was alive, he'd turn over in his grave. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. my fear, my joy more horrible than my fear, my obscene words, my words which are keys locking me into a mirror, with you, but ever alone.”, “If Lincoln were alive today he'd be turning over in his grave.”, “Rescuing myself’ is an oxymoron that will leave me in the perpetual need of being rescued ‘from myself’.”, “You are a foreigner in an actual world, a human co-worker, a truth, a divine word, and a perfect mistake.”, “GOD is foolishness and GOD is wisdom all at the same time.”, “And where did this insane notion of buying loyalty come from? See the mirror in your eyes. --, A man's silence is wonderful to listen to. --, People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think. Other than that it is totally G rated.”, “Like apes, we breed, sleep, and die. --, How come you did what I told you to do, when you know I don't know what I'm talking about. --.

People want to change everything and, at the same time, want it all to remain the same. --, Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.

It's a tricky thing to try to own something that remains in your possession even after you give it to many others. I will be disruptive of it. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other. I wouldn't be paranoid if everyone didn't pick on me.


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